Alien
by ValaMagic
Summary: SJ one-shot. Urgo does a little matchmaking...


AN: I love Urgo, he's just so funny, so i thought i'd write a fic where he did something good for once...

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Alien

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"Bo-oring" Urgo chanted in a sing-song voice. Major Samantha Carter ignored the annoying hallucination and continued to collaborate the equipment in front of her.

"I know what would be fun" he awaited a response from the working Major, but continued upon realising she was ignoring him "Let's go see the Colonel, I can think of some things that would be fun" he told her waggling her eyebrows. Sam stared determinedly at her work, forcing all thoughts of Jack O'Neill into the deepest recesses of her brain.

"I know you want to. I can read your thoughts, remember" the image beside her continued. "Think how much better it could be" she almost groaned at the thought of his hand and lips touching her with her current heightened senses.

"Go away Urgo!" she told him trying to remember why she and the Colonel had not previously acted upon their feelings. Oh yeah. It was against regulations and she didn't even know if he shared her feelings.

"He does" Urgo said happily and for once did as she requested and disappeared.

* * *

"Jack-y" Jack groaned willing the voice to be his imagination, of course he reasoned, technically it was. A very annoying one.

"Let's go see Major Carter" the entity whined "Fulfil the dirty fantasies I know you have about her. By the way what was that blue uniform she was wearing?"

"Dress blues" Jack replied "Wait! Urgo, that was private!" the Colonel screamed.

"You thought about it, I didn't mean to overhear. It seemed like so much fun though, much better than sitting here with this paperwork. Come on, please!" Urgo begged.

"It's against regulations" Jack told him

"Okay" Urgo conceded. He was silent for a few moments "Pleee-aaase!" he begged.

"No"

* * *

Jack avoided Sam for two days after his discussion with Urgo, which was made more difficult by their linked brains which bought them all running as feed time. Jack had taken to wolfing down his food despite Urgo's protests and interrupting him whenever he tried to bring up Sam Carter. However early on the third day Jack was requested at an urgent briefing as Sam believed she had found a solution to the Urgo problem.

Jack tried to ignore Urgo dancing around Sam pointedly indicating that Jack should make a move. Same stared at her commanding officer confused. Urgo tried a different track, whispering into Jack's ear "Now, it's perfect. She looks hot. Doesn't she look hot. They're all watching, that just makes it better"

Jack stared resolutely at his pen, as a blush spread across his face. Sam raised her eyebrow at Daniel across the table, who shrugged in return. The Colonel was certainly acting strangely. Urgo swapped to Sam "He wants you. Right now" he told her. "He has fantasies about doing it right here" Sam pressed her hand to her smouldering cheek and a though occurred to her.

She scribbled quickly on a spare sheet of paper and slid it to the Colonel. He read the paper quickly and nodded. Urgo snuck a glance over Jack's shoulder. "You're in" he told Jack waggling his eyebrows.

* * *

"Carter" Jack greeted ten minutes after the briefing ended.

"Has Urgo been bugging you too?" she asked closing the door of her lab, Jack nodded in response, wondering where Sam was heading, and glad that Urgo was for once absent.

"Urgo would be counted as an alien influence, wouldn't he?"

"Probably" Jack agreed, sure he knew where Sam was going, though neither dare speak the words aloud.

"So we could..."

"Yeah. This, with..."

"And no, you know..."

"Nope"

"Right"

He stepped toward her not quite sure what they had just decided.

"Not on base"

"Right" he agreed.

* * *

"We're actually doing this?" she asked when they were ensconced in Jack's house following an awkward drive.

"Looks like it" he replied.

"If anyone finds out, we were under the influence of alien technology. It made us do stuff." She said trying to convince herself as much as Jack.

"Stuff like this?" he asked pressing his lips against hers. Sam searched Jack's eyes seeing confidence that she knew was not reflected in her own. She had just decided to break regulations, with her 

commanding officer. The enormity of the decision scared her, but the thought of doing something forbidden excited her.

Jack's lips pressed against hers again, like electricity shooting through her body. She couldn't ever remember feeling so aroused. As his tongue pressed against her lips she allowed him access, feeling his hot tongue slide across her own.

"Now this is fun, isn't it" a voice interrupted.

"Urgo!" they yelled in unison.

"But it's so damn exciting. Daniel and Teal'c are so boring" his expression mirroring that of a puppy smacked on the nose by a newspaper.

"Urgo" Jack warned.

"Fine" the being disappeared from their vision and Sam's last coherent thought before the feel of Jack engulfed her was that maybe having Urgo wasn't all bad.

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Please review... i wrote it in like two hours so be nice ;)


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